Posts Tagged ‘dropping the gloves’

I like movies and I like hockey. So naturally I was excited to hear a hockey movie was coming about the fighter on a team.

And when I heard that Stiffler from the American Pie movies would be playing the lead role I thought this could be really funny.

But whether the movie is funny or not has nothing to do with the fact that this movie is going to miss big time when it comes to protraying the fighter in hockey.

Why would I say this? Or better yet, how could I say this when I haven’t even see the movie? Well for a number of reasons. Here are my Top 5 Reasons the Movie ‘Goon’ Will Miss when it comes to protraying the fighter in hockey.

Reason #1 – Can’t Skate

In the movie Stiffler’s character is not a hockey player. He doesn’t even know how to skate. Apparently the producers of the movie liked the fact Sean William Scott (who plays the goon) couldn’t skate himself which allowed for a more genuine portrayal of the goon.

Don’t fall for this. You will not advance to any level of professional hockey these days if you can’t skate regardless of what a movie tells you.

Reason #2 – One Dimensional

The movie portrays the goon as a player with one purpose. To be a presence, to intimidate and to fight if called upon. This may be very similar to the responsilities of the fighter on any team.

But in real life it doesn’t end there. Take for example the players with the most fighting majors in the NHL this season. Scott Thornton has a Stanley Cup ring with the Bruins. And Brandon Prust is with the Rangers atop the Eastern Conference this year. Both players also chip 20-30 points a year.

Even if you’re a fighter you need to be able to contribute in other ways as these two guys are.

Reason #3 – You Need to Be Missing Teeth

Maybe back in the 70s or 80s it was more common to recognize hockey players by their missing teeth and scars. But now with cosmetic surgery, mouth guards and advanced medical facilities within main areans there is no reason to be walking around without a full set of bright white choppers.

Plus you are more likely to be missing teeth from a stick or a deflection as opposed to blocking a couple of knuckle sandwiches with your face.

Reason #4 – Can’t Be Educated

In the movie Scott’s character comes from a family of intellectuals and he is not. He is therefore the outcast and apparently is perfectly suited as the enforcer on his team.

True, there is no minimum IQ requirement to drop the gloves and go with someone. But the stereotype that these guys are all dummies is old.

I can recall discussing movies, travel, literature and many other topics with the fighers I’ve trained. Some liked to do Sudoku puzzles. Others were into cards. And almost all of them were as quick witted as could be. I’ve always considered a quick sense of humour a sign of intelligence.

Don’t fall for the stereotype that all fighters are dummies.

Reason #5 – Not the Same on Ice

Have you ever heard of football teams trying out world class sprinters as wide receivers or to return kicks? Rarely works, doesn’t it?

Just because you’re good at something in one dimension doesn’t mean it translates to all. In this case the Goon is a bouncer at a bar. And we’re to make the connection that he’s a good fighter at the bar therefore he’ll make a good fighter on a hockey team. Doubtful.

If you’ve been in a hockey fight or worked with players who have you’ll know this a totally different beast. The difference in surface should be an obvious one. But there’s also the element of trying to tie up your opponent’s arms and trying not to land too many punches on the side of your opponent’s helmet. Add to that the fact you may have just completed a hard 40 second shift and still have stitches from your last fight. Not really the conditions of a bar fight, is it?


I’ll still go to the Goon. And I’m sure I’ll laugh. The directors and producers are sure to include as many hockey stereotypes in the movie for effect. Hopefully you’ll see it as entertainment and how far from the mark it is to what a real hockey fighter is like.